It’s session 2 of my 30 day challenge.
The pain in my shoulder or some areas of my back lingers. I will not be stopped. The rewards I get from Bikram yoga are so great, it will take much more than this pain to stop me. At any rate, it is exactly matters like these I go to Bikram to work on.
I am there. As usual the room is full. There are 39 people rostered for the 30 day challenge. All 39 will compete for the same air – hot air. I am focused on every move. They take a lot of physical strength but greater mental strength is required. Rafa says ‘don’t think just do it’. We comply.
A back pain travels with me – the product of my adding 2 children to the world population. In all my Bikram yoga practice I am focusing on healing my back. When I started Bikram I struggled through some poses because of that pain. I could not move from shavasana (dead body pose) to a straight sit up. I did it my way – like a ripe old lady- but that is the only way I could. Now I can do the sit up with a minor adjustment of the legs – no pain. My hope is that at the end of the 30 day challenge I will be able to do that pose without making any adjustments. Already my back pain is ever so slight.
The practice is hard but it feels great. Sweat oozes from my back and face. Every piece of cloth or clothes on or near me is wet. I replenish with sips of coconut water plus another concoction I made. The poses are harder for me as I go deeper into them. I focus my mind as if I am preparing for the next Olympics. I have heard Rafa several times saying to others who don’t push enough ‘don’t waste your money and come to Bikram if you are not going to push’. I am pushing.
I lie on my back in shavasana and all I see and think about are the blades of the fan spinning above me for that short period of time. My mind is tabla rasa – blank. As I came into this world, so am I when I am in shavasana at Bikram Yoga. I feel I am getting there and I am doing all I can to stay there.